Dear Mr. Chusington Howe Foxworthy,

Thank you for returning my manuscript and your enclosed nasty nimeny pimeny little note. I am afraid your letter is most unsuitable for me at the present time, as I have spent the entire weekend writing the novel that you have summarily rejected, I can only presume that it is company policy to reject all manuscripts not submitted in ten foot high braille. And yes I am aware that it is traditionally bad form to respond to any form of criticism or rejection but in this as with all else, I am an innovator, therefore I may freely address you as piss-midget. Still there’s time for you to change your views and I think you will when we meet, and meet we most assuredly will when I suck out your eyes and use them as stoppers for my ears to muffle the screams you will make while I headbutt you into a fine paste. I do hope you will not be disheartened by your sudden violent death.

Yours Faithfully,
Bernard Black